Tuesday, 27 January 2009

Eko Diaries

Yesterday 1655hrs

This time it was from the one they call the Garden City Airport, the one where the almighty crash proof Dash 80 planes leave from. It was quite an unusually smooth flight into the commercial nerve centre of the motherland. How glorious it was driving into this island and have that heavy traffic jam on the other side of the road, at least until I was on the highway that goes beyond the Peninsula.


Today, few minutes after 0607hrs

We are stuck in light traffic, had light breakfast at some the Republic for fowl and then unto some business.


About 0828hrs

Enquiries and some not so long but careful consideration. Some queen’s English ensued and numbers changed hands, some even confidential.


Round one was over 30mins before 1000hours. It was a 35 – 65 balance and a rematch was scheduled.


Live in LasGidiz, motorless

Traffic was growing and I had to be at another location. My driver was gone & busy elsewhere. I know my way around these parts and where to stand. I run across the gray & white Giraffe Crossing avoiding that bastard that drove like the car was stolen. On the other side now, what I feared the most was about to happen to me. I was faced with the very deadly, most talked about situation in the city. My biggest dilemma yet for the year 2009.


Helmet or No Helmet?

Baroque was on the sidewalk looking as confused as ever. A bike had stopped in front of me, by the slow moving traffic. Then I saw it, a purple cheap looking crash helmet on his handle bars, for me to wear. Oh No, GOD please!


“Well, no one knows me in this town” I said to myself

Then the million dollar question again,”Helmet or No Helmet”

Helmet or No Helmet? No Helmet or LASMA? LASMA or Ring Worm?


“TAXI” I called out “Ahmadu Bello Way”

“One thousand naira” he replied seemingly unwilling

I was already in the front seat


1128hrs

Settled down to do some work then was on the phone, dialoguing with Eko. A late lunch in view. I went back to work. After failed attempts to achieve my new targets, I Ctrl-N my word page and start typing…

59 comments:

Shubby Doo said...

just marking my spot darling;-)...going back to read

Shubby Doo said...

lol...ahhh the timeless dilema...red pill or blue pill...helmet or no helmet ...but just for you baroque, the earth heavens opened up and showed you the way with a blinding light...'TAXI” I called out “Ahmadu Bello Way”'...kai...at least the light bulb came on in that your head

LMAO...baroque i would pay that N1000 too...i did this xmas and even tipped the driver N500 as my compliments for the season

p.s
re: helmets...one should always wear one...people should really consider buying one for themselves...cheap compared to the cost of a life...come i know okada is a rare thing for you baroque...how you gree allow your driver disappear?

pp.s
hmmm...this post seems familiar...

miz-cynic said...

u have kuku said it.....i have a small mind abi...me i no "overstand" this post o.btw u have some comments on ur preview post....go respond.

Jayjazzy said...

yeah very familar post it seems... 1st time leaving a comment here, just wanna say love ya blog...

Buttercup said...

top 5..cooooooooooooooooooooool!

off to read

Buttercup said...

lol @ republic for fowl..

"Helmet or No Helmet? No Helmet or LASMA? LASMA or Ring Worm?" hahahahaha! for some reason, i just cant imagine u on an okada..

kmplx said...

def for the taxi! lol! and why DO drivers just disappear like that? where do they go? some parallel universe?

Jarrai said...

Take a taxi over a helmet anyday...lol at "No Helmet or LASMA? LASMA or Ring Worm?"

Am coming to nja to open my designer helmet company....sort out all this helmet shinagagan!

bumight said...

just #1000? the taxi guy didnt even charge u!

i cant type how much i spent on taxis since the day of the fineboy agbero incident!

Temite said...

err dear, are you trying to put the okada riders out of business ni?

mizchif said...

lol@ repbublic for fowl!

Helmet or LASMA,LASMA or ringworm!
Betterkeep ur driver on a very short, tight leash!

~Sirius~ said...

LOL! Poor you, hope it was a chick whiz you got at the Republic......

Out of Blogsville love, I could be your emergency chauffeur when ever your driver ups and disappears.....you know, help keep that ringworm option out for good.

Welcome to Giddy....

Afrobabe said...

lmao...was hoping you took the bike and took a pic to show off ur new looks...

Afolabi said...

the whole helmet thing sounds like a good and bad idea. At least a few people's lives would be saved or there'll be less injuries, if there were any accidents. But to wear those helmets in the heat, the risk of infections, ring worm !..lol..I just trying to picture how the whole scene is back in PH and lag, with people wearing helmets on Okada..

LusciousRon said...

Oh boy! I have been in Las Giddy for like a week now I am almost bankrupt with all the cabs I have been taking all in the name of 'helmet or no helmet/what if i disappear?'

badderchic said...

can you imagine, he is in Lag and hasn't come to wax my engine, bullsit re

bArOquE said...

~shubby, you’r welcome anytime to your spot…my dear, I had to be smart about it oh.hahaha…I have just purchased a bright red crash helmet I carry around for the ‘incasity’ of entering okadas

~mizcynic, what is it you don’t overstand? don’t be cumfoozed!

~jayjazzy, thanks for dropping…do you want a cup of coffee?

~buttershizzle, yes Top 5. believe me, I cant imagine me on a bike, anymore, that is…

~kmplx, alas I didn’t have the driver the entire day, I actually was the one who let him go

~Jarrai, please come, design and sort out all this helmet shenanigans

~bumight, the cab thing no be small matter oh…I cant even begin to explain, minus the traffic situation

~temite, I’m actually down with flying across town on bike…they can be very efficient for sharp wakaz

bArOquE said...

~mizchif, I will try not to let the driver go next time

~sirius, no chik whiz oh…I wasn’t even the one doing breakfast *wink*…please can I have that cab number, sorry, your number

~afrobaby, me? on a bike? not today...you no like me again oh?!?

~Afolabi, there are no more bikes in PHC oh…come & see people trekking!..spoiling their shoes

~LuciousRon, wetin you dey do for LasGidis?

~chairlady…no be like that...you know how badly I want to boil your corn…common

miz-cynic said...

no comment!i didnt understand it cos i was reading deeper meanings to them...but i guess all u were talking about was okada...i used to take it like crazy one time to work and then hitch a ride with a colleague back home ....cos i was too lazy to drive in hold-up ....the holdup in my est...tht same est along the peninsula no get part two...until one day i wanted to take it as usual and i was accosted with the helmet.....i ran to the next bus...since then i started braving holdup in my car....so sad i tell u.

Beulah! said...

Oops!, i thot i was the only one with the phobia for "helmets"...First time here, nice blog!

N.I.M.M.O said...

Baroque: Welcome to the new Gidi - The dream of all Megacities!

@Jarrai: I think you got it, that's just what Gidi needs right now.

@Temite/Afolabi/LusciousRon: Do not say I told you but that is the intention. Make okada business so unattractive that people will rather take a taxi (or BRT).

Its part of the megacity dream. Fashole just decided not to be as crude as Amechi or el-Rufai, let's see if this 'economic blockade of okada' will work in Gidi.

StandTall-The Activist said...

Lol at your "Helmet or no Helmet" decision

"Some queen’s English ensued..." nicely worded

Hope traffic did not delay you still when u borded that taxi

Just...Toluwa said...

lol @ lasma or ring worm. I dnt think if i ever had to get on a bike, i wld put one of those "nonsenses" on my head. Hope i neva have to sha!

exschoolnerd said...

lol @ LASMA or Ringworm..

hmmm so u in lagos...for how long?

kmplx said...

so am i forgiven?

bArOquE said...

~mizcynic, no doubts there were a few things that needed inner overstanding but you got the overall message…how sad can mobility be my sweet? MOBILITY IS POWER

~Beulah, the helmet phobia should be given a real name, what do you think:?

~NIMMO, the dream of all megacities…you can say that again…I like the freedom on the road in PH but people that don’t have cars are suffering & the traffic is manic

~sTandtAll, I was only going two streets away & the traffic wasn’t much, it hardly ever is on Adeola Odeku

~nothin but Toluwa, you might just have to…lemme tel you a secret, I had to enter one yesterday (short distance)…he had the kind that power-bikers use, where you fit your entire head in…I carefully choose him so I can claim that my head couldn’t fit…well, however I was in the mood for the yawa, so i didnt send…thank GOD sha, no LASMA there

~XSN, hahaha…how na?...alas, i’m back to my office in PH…why? *wink*

~kmplx, I no get grudge…but I wont share my Coke with you sha

OluwaDee said...

I have been faced with this dilemma, I settled for a tricycle.

miz-cynic said...

sad because i dnt compromise my comfort and hold-up is not comforting.i heard PH is even more notorious for holdup...guess i cant settle in PH then.

~Sirius~ said...

Ops! Sorry, Cab.....Errrm, My No: 080NICETRY!

kmplx said...

water nko?

Tyger said...

was hoping you rode the bike with a bucket for a helmet
chicken you!

how ya doing?

bArOquE said...

~Oluwadee, KEKE NAPEP??? wetin dey worry this woman? if no be BRT, na Combi...does Rabbi know about this?

~miz-cynic, of course you can settle in PH, i have a spare room where we can move our clothes into to make more space in my room...meanwhile, the traffic of this morning is still on

~Sirius, abeg joo, i no kuku need that your number again...i got a better offer, a sure banker *hiss*

~kmplx, vodka yes!

~tyger, bad belle...i dey kamkpe

ibiluv said...

sweets..........you for use hanky cover ya precious head.....*wink*

Original Mgbeke said...

Hia! This 'rematch' wey you reschedule, na round 2 of the kpanshing? :-p

LOL @ Lasma or Ringworm. Lasma abeg..what the hell? E be laik say man pikin suppose dey hold aluminium protective cap for bag to wear with that helmet. Shuoooo...

NigerianDramaQueen said...

Tu as une vie tres occupee je vois!
The one thing i fear about those helmets is lice man!!
anyways how r u doing my love?
have a g8 weekend!
xoxo

NaijaBabe said...

Boil your corn...wax the engine....was all dis???

But seriously? Ringworm....thats no good o

Mustafa Şenalp said...

çok güzel site.:)

miz-cynic said...

baroque! baroque!....*snickers* im just greeting u o.u just succeeded in shutting me up.

bArOquE said...

~ibiluv, my sweet baby, no be hanky issue oh…better hair wey I comb like this eh, I no wan hear story…how u dey?

~originalMgbeks, abeg, you get another thing we for like make we involve?

~NDQ, Il ne s'agit pas de ma faute. Je suis la recherche d'un secrétaire aussi. Please don’t talk about lice, I saw a documentary on them the very next day…NOT GOOD!

~naijaBabe, boil engine, wax corn…relax, e no consine you, yet!...do you live in Lagos?

~Mustafa, thanks for dropping by

~mizCynic, mizCynic, I dey answer your greeting…I’m cleaning the room out already…so when you dey come

miz-cynic said...

so tht i can become the girl from ur rape post abi?thank you very much.....or the one from ur rave and rant post about u stopping mid-coitus.

theicequeen said...

hehe..republic for fowl..

helmet or lifetime krawkraw...at least PH peoples don't have that wahala..their own na trek and roast under sun or stay at home and become broke..

"Miz-cynic...PH more notorious for holdup? compared to where biko?

mike said...

amusing. very nice posy

miz-cynic said...

compared to las gidi of course.do u live in PH

kmplx said...

am there.

bArOquE said...

~mizCynic, i dont know what you're talking about!

~iceQueen, the trekking in PH is a teww mad

~Mike, thanks

~kmplx, do you want ice in it?...i dont!

miz-cynic said...

is tht why ur replying my comment first?.im sure there are fumes coming out of ur ears like those cartoons,chill!u sure know wht i'm talking about.stop inviting innocent vulnerable,naive young women to ur house!whether ur joking or not!

Smaragd said...

well, there is always the corporate cab! but just as a safety check, always have a hanky with u, i have a small hat! just as a safety check.

JideSalu's Diary said...

Heloooooooo,

Nice 'house'. My first time here.

This helmet rule is really a bother o. However, life sweet too o. Why can it not be a fashion accessory, I mean, for everyone to carry one like a handbag, abi.

I will come back for another visit.

You are invited to mine as well, come check me out.

I have said it as it is...

Takia and God bless

rethots said...

...did you pay royalty to Isi for that title 'Eko Dialogue' oops 'Eko Diaries'?

bArOquE said...

~mizCynic, abeg oh, who be innocent, vulnerable & naïve? YOU??? i fit die!...hahaha

~eSmerAlda, can that hat fit in your bag? or you have the carry the extra load

~jIdeSalU, Baba Jide, you have a point in the fashion helmet thing, but you might want to talk to Jarrai make una collabo…anyway, do come back. coffee on the house

~rEthotz, broda mi, I forgot to mention, I grabbed a copy of Eko Dialogue on that trip…*wink*

miz-cynic said...

baroque...i am innocent vulnerable and naive...oya die!

ablackjamesbond said...

Baroque is back in gidi! Make we drink that beer already.

badderchic said...

boil my corn? Im the one who wants to burn your 'boli' send your email to badderchic@gmail so i can invite you.

Afronuts said...

Bwahahahaha!!!

'Helmet or No Helmet? No Helmet or LASMA? LASMA or Ring Worm?
“TAXI” I called out “Ahmadu Bello Way”

That was funny! The whole situation turning u into a scatterbrain...I know the feeling

Buttercup said...

baroquizzle, what the hell is that poll u put up about? u made misvote due to confusion..lol..

Spicytee said...

The fear of Helmet is d beginning of gbogbo bigs gals..But seriously is not dat one cannot afford a cab 2 one's every destinations.

But traffic and other naija bad road curses always make everyone opt for okada everytime.

Me am looking for a portable helmet sha..If anyone see,holla at me..I will buy it at whatever cost..But be reasonable ooo..LOL

bArOquE said...

~mizCynic, innocent, vulnerable & naive...i don die already

~blak007, one cold bottle of Odeku...order am sharply

~chairlady, dont fuck around me, i warn you!

~afroNuts, no be small scatterbrains oh...i had to make my decisions quik

~buTTershizzlE, wetin dey confuse you? ask OluwaDee...!

~spicyTee, please how do we relate 'whatever cost' & 'reasonability'?

Buttercup said...

u r obviously not a woman jo..yea, i shud have chosen 'ask oluwadee'..

Jaguda said...

u made the right choice by paying for that cab