FirstTimes...

...as my mother would say,” there is a first time for everything…” there is, really, as I have come to find out...even when it seems like it’s something you’ve done before…these moments give our lives its uniqueness and our individualities…you might not feel excited or very special as a first timer but truth is, you are…like the foremost moment cannot be relived so have you lost your opportunity to make the first impression…some first times are magical…some disasters…some we live to regret…or forget, until you start blogging

…my first job; thank GOD for my father… after 2nd year, uni…got me my very first job (intern sha) in one of his friends company…me, earn salary?...excited…well, the amount wasn’t so ‘great’… learnt a great deal about my profession there…should buy him a special gift for this reason…love my father but dunno if I can ever tell him

…first real kiss; after reading a whole lot about the union of lips and the mingling of tongues…practice with my mirror…it was like heaven with my then girlfriend…coincidentally her first too…she thought I was a very good…from years of practice…now I know I’m good…from obvious years of practice & reading…I have only improved since then…truth

...first wank; end of junior secondary…even before I learnt of the word ‘masturbation’…happened by mistake…the fluid was still clear…sure it couldn’t fertilise nothing…GOSH…I’d never felt so sick in all my life…& then did it again soon after…& again

…first shag; for more reasons than shall be given…at a brothel…my cousin ‘detoured’ us one night from our journey to get milk for our new puppy…well, I can now give my sex fibs some substance…won’t be so inexpert when the time for the ‘real’ one comes…prove to my cousin that I was a big boy…terrifying event…still wonder how I attained & maintained an erection…I must have been a bad boy

…my first 4 times in one night; December 2004…thought I was gonna die after the 2nd one…she came twice…well I finally arrived…about 1½hrs later, BJ & another go...number 3…wild & windy…repeat broadcast…another go...number four…fleeting & to the point…passed out…barely stayed awake the next day at work

…my first 4 times in 1 evening; I boast not…on second thoughts…why not…na something to boast about…anyway, I was totally drained that evening…sometime between 7pm and just before midnight…in her brothers’ room…her folks were away on a golfing cruise…no 4, I was at the door…she ripped my clothes off…GOD, GIVE ME MY LAST POWER!…she was HOTT!…no better way to commit suicide

…first car shag; twice as nice…the two bouts of straff…& it wasn’t in my backseat…car neatly parked behind a dead trailer on a lonely GRA street…lived with my parents then so what did you expect…me, straddled on the reclined driver’s seat…she scraped her left knee a bit…ended on the passenger’s seat…number 2, backed up against me, standing by the open passenger’s door…she had the loveliest tits ever...at least until 3weeks ago

…first time arrest; one Sunday, 8.00pmish…wasn’t a real arrest anyway…my hand inside her top…her hand on junior…both of us fully clothed…bright lights from the yellow combi bus…OMG, I don die…to the police station...after so much diplomatic ‘yarnings’ & sweet-talks… over ½ an hour later…money changed hands …discharged & acquitted…to serve & protect with integrity

…my first blow job & near miss; away on holidays…teenager…woke up to a half erection… could feel the heat from ‘HIS’ breathe on my dick…WHAT D’F?!@K...pretended to be asleep…enjoyed every moment…he probably stopped when he realised he wasn’t gonna get any ‘loving’ back…in the morning, nothing happened…he was my cousin…nevermind, I don’t feel abused…not the slightest bit

…my first love; 2 years older…kinda into older women…she was created for me…she liked everything I liked, especially, the music…she had all the cd’s I wanted…spoke better English…with an slight ‘britiko’ accent…denied it, said I was the one that spoke with an accent, like an ‘aje’…infrequently read the dictionary like me…lovely voice but refused to sing…very cute bum…BEST KISSER EVER…never more sensuous sex have I had…she sliced tomatoes in a funny way…but the stew always tasted good…I still use some of her phrases to date…never told her I was in love with her until she went away…I think I’ve gotten over her…not sure though...still BEST KISSER EVER

…first near miss; 8.30pm ish…on the steps to the shed behind the state director’s house…NYSC camp…no lights…NEPA…her nipples in my mouth and my fingers in her core…my right ear in between her lips…muffled whimpers of pleasure…all of a sudden…footsteps, light from a hand held torch heading in our direction, from the other side of the shed…James Bond & Pussy Galore…dodging in the penumbra until outta sight…camp official walks on by…we continue...SENSELESS LOVERS… the guy returns 10mins later with company…one of us, fellow Corp member…this time directly facing us…we ran…laughing…DESPERADOS…we found a darker surer spot…that wasn’t all we found…co-offender too…corpers of the night…we all shared the darkness

…my first ménage a trios; of course I wasn’t man enough, how can I be when the other jimmy was twice mine in size, I was gonna go for sloppy seconds or lousy firsts…not on your life, or mine